Long, long ago...

Hi everyone.. It’s been a long long time since I last blogged. What are my excuses? No time – REALLY no time, been extremely with my work lately. Not enough sleep – I always end up dozing off in front of the computer many times. Blahh...

My work? Alright, not too bad. Just that workload is starting to get real hectic. Got the children’s portfolio reports and work to do & file in ‘coz the annual mid-term Parent-Teacher-Conference is coming on the 8th June. Have to complete the children’s progress report as well for this conference. On top of that still have the daily lessons to plan, lesson plans to write, check through the children’s work everyday… So, who says being a pre-school teacher is easy?! NOOOOooo!!!!!! .. @_@ … Well, glad that I still have the children’s company… HeeHee… Yesterday I was doing work with one of the boys in my class. Then I told him “You need to take the card, write the numbers & cut along the lines ok?” Guess how he answered me? FYI, this boy is NOT scared of me in anyway @ all, & he’s only 5. The way he talks to me is like talking to his friend. Haha.. Anyway he told me “Ya lah, ya lah, yes Mdm, Yes Mdm. I know what to do.” Goodness, @ that moment, I don’t know how to react.. Then later on I asked him “Who am I to you?” And he answered me “You are my boss lor! Yes boss.’. *PeNg* … If the wall was right beside me I would have banged right into it. Haha… The best part was, I’ve never been able to make him cry @ all… Got lar, there were a few times, but out of the close-to-3 yrs I’ve been with him, the frequency is countable under 5 fingers… =X …

Hm… I was extremely tired from rushing down to the hospital after work and then home late. My maternal was hospitalized, been over a week or so. She has stroke many years back and was bed ridden for close to 7 or 8 yrs, if I’m not wrong. Anyway, her condition, I mean a bed ridden patient for that long, what would anyone expect? So, I didn’t dare to hope for much too. I am already feeling very guilty and my heart is full of extreme regret for not having spent enough time with her; and for not visiting her often enough. That was why I told myself as long as I can, I will go n visit her. Tuesday she went for an x-ray because she could not pass out urine as what she would normally do. And you know what? The report diagnosed her as having ovary cancer @ the 3rd stage. Sigh… When my uncle told me that, I was just beside my grandma holding her hands. My tears dropped. Operate also no use. She’s 76, fragile, bed ridden. Would any treatment help? She definitely cannot take chemotherapy. You noe sthing, when my siblings & I were young, she used to buy KFC for us without fail whenever we go to her house. ArghHh… What can I say? I lost my paternal grandfather when I was 15, I was regretful. Oh yes, a few days ago, I dreamt of my paternal father’s funeral. In the dream I was thinking: he’s already dead, how come another one? Then when I walked round to his coffin to see, I saw a lady instead of him. I woke up after tt. Weird. I was so afraid sthing will happen to my grandma, and it did. =( …

Well… I’m counting the days. I just hope everything will be fine for her. I’m going to the temple one of these days and pray for her. Unless a person has lost a dear one before, he/she will never understand how I feel now…